In a Second, Things Can Change

A Tribute to My Dad

Today would have been my father's 73rd birthday. But nine months ago yesterday, a massive heart attack took him away much too suddenly and very unexpectedly. None of us were prepared then or now for the loss or void that followed so swiftly, so deeply and so heart wrenchingly. There's an ache that never quite disappears but the memories become so vivid and so powerful so immediately.

Thankfully, I’d had a long, casual conversation with my father just days before he departed. And today, that gives me much comfort, though it doesn’t take away any of the pain. We spoke of many things, neither of us aware then that this would be our last conversation or that those would be our final words. One moment, though, we were saying our sweet goodbyes and then just 3 days later, I’d see him no more.

For my mother, it was even more startling. She and my father had run errands, were out and about town, and all seemed well. He’d made a purchase and they’d enjoyed lunch. They were seen by many friends and acquaintances who expressed their own shock at having seen him just hours before – looking good and feeling fine. I heard those words over and over as many stopped by to share their own memories. And, their words gave us many cherished thoughts to cling to in the days and years ahead.

The lesson learned for me, the moment I got that dreaded call, was how quickly things can change.

In tribute to my Dad, I wanted to take a moment to share the things I’ll remember most, miss the most and the life-long lessons that he instilled.

They weren’t necessarily expressed as such before, though I hope he knew how much he was cherished, how much of a difference he made and how special he was.

What I’ll Remember Most 

·       My father was a farmer in Virginia. He loved the great outdoors, the freedom of his independent profession and was the hardest working man I know

·       He knew no strangers and was known for his distinctive wave and a ready smile

·       He was passionate about many things and wasn’t afraid to share his views

·       He made many midnight runs to pick me up as a teen, where we’d often find him asleep as he waited for our return

·       How giving he was to so many and how quietly. If you weren’t the recipient, you never would have known

·       That occasional look that preceded the occasional temper

·       The ever present hat, white pocket Ts, plaid flannel shirts, jeans, boots and overalls

What I’ll Miss the Most

·         Puppy dog eyes and a smile that lit up the room

·         The biggest, strongest hands I know

·         The scent of the earth - dusty roads and fields, gas and oil, tobacco and dirt

·         A quiet unassuming nature but a boisterous laugh 

·         Meandering drives where he was unrushed, looking left and right, taking in all around him

·         Long lingering conversations that sometimes got him sidetracked J

The Life-long Lessons that he Instilled

·         Love what you do and do what you love

·         Pursue your passion - hence the name of my blog

·         Live with honor and integrity

·         Actions speak louder than words

·         It’s the little things that matter most

In life, my Dad taught me first and foremost a love of honesty and respect, of morals and values  evidenced by how we live more than by what we say. As a writer, I’ve learned from Dad the power and impact of words – both spoken and unspoken - and that we communicate in all that we do. He also taught me that the influence others have on us and us on them can be profound - even when we don't know it at the time. 

I’m honored to be my Daddy’s girl and I treasure everything he gave, provided and instilled.